When my boyfriend got sick, he asked me to come stay with him and help him through his recovery. We’d been dating for about a year — not long enough to be “serious,” but definitely long enough to care deeply for each other.
He had a high fever, body aches, and was barely able to get out of bed. I dropped everything and went to his place, bringing soup, medicine, clean towels, and a lot of love.
For days, I cooked for him, cleaned up after him, made sure he took his meds on time, and even slept beside him just so he wouldn’t feel alone. I did everything I could to make him comfortable.
But instead of gratitude, what I got was something else entirely.
One night, as I sat beside him rubbing his back while he coughed uncontrollably, he turned to me and said, “You know, most girls wouldn’t do this.”
I smiled and said, “Well, I’m not most girls.”
Then came the words that broke me.
“I don’t think you’re doing all this because you care,” he said. “I think you’re trying to prove that you deserve me.”
I froze.
It felt like someone had punched me in the chest. Not because I believed what he said — but because he actually thought it.
I didn’t respond right away. I just looked at him, wondering how things had gone from me nursing him back to health… to him questioning my intentions.
The next morning, I packed my things and left.
Not in anger — in sadness.
I wasn’t there to earn his love. I was there because I already gave it freely. And if he couldn’t see that — if he saw kindness as desperation — then maybe we weren’t on the same page after all.
We talked a few days later. He apologized, saying he didn’t mean it the way it came out. But the damage was done.
Sometimes, people can be blinded by their own insecurities. And sometimes, no matter how much you give, it’s not going to be enough if the other person doesn’t believe they deserve it.
That experience taught me a powerful lesson: You can’t pour into someone who thinks your love is a transaction.
And now? I know better.